The first time you meet with your child’s homeroom teacher can feel like the most significant meeting you will have all school year. Why? Because you are a fierce advocate for your child with autism, of course. Rightly so, you recognize this as an opportune moment to connect with the teacher and to convey critical information about your child’s special needs, challenges, and goals.

Relax. Take a deep breath. We understand it can feel daunting to pull together and communicate all of this information in a 30-45 minute teacher conference meeting. We also know this won’t be your only chance to discuss your child with his teacher. The school year is nearly 300 days long and there will be plenty of opportunities to communicate in person and through email in the weeks and months to come.

Here are 10 tips from ACES for parents to help you get ready for the new school year and a new homeroom teacher:

1. Patience, my friend.
   Think of your relationship to your child’s teacher as an ongoing collaboration with a shared goal of helping your child realize his or her full potential. It’s going to take more than one day, or one meeting, for real progress to occur. You know this to be true at home as well.
2. Stay positive.
   This teacher is different than other teachers. He or she comes to the table with their own strengths. Avoid bringing your frustrations or negative experiences from the past too much in to the present. Every school year can be viewed as a fresh start with a fresh attitude.
3. Review and reflect.
   Go back and look over the documentation and data from last school year. Ask yourself key questions like, “What progress was made on the goals from last year’s IEP?” “What are the areas (behavioral, social, and academic) I want to see the teacher focusing on this year?”
4. Knowledge is power.
   Get to know your rights as a parent of a child with autism. There is a wealth of information available about the IDEA Act (Individuals with Disabilities Education Act). There are special education services for which your child may be eligible. Use the internet to help you navigate the school system on behalf of your child with autism.
5. Question and answer.
   This initial meeting and others that follow is a conversation… a continuing dialogue. Be ready with your questions and also expect the teacher to have some for you as well. If you don’t know the answer right away, make a note and follow-up with the teacher as soon as possible.
6. Trust but verify.
   Ask about assessments, data collection, and reporting. Know what information is being captured (academics and behavior), how progress will be tracked throughout the year, and how this data are reported to you. Use the information gathered to inform yourself about your child and to discuss adjustments with his or her teacher where needed.
7. Log in.
   If you don’t already have an account set up, you likely have access to some sort of parent portal offered by the school district so be sure to check that out. Often times the school will post grades, attendance, discipline, and other helpful information online.
8. Stay connected.
   Suggest and schedule a follow-up meeting within a month or two of the start of school. The school may have a special fall conference day but if that doesn’t work for you, set up a time that does. You’ll stay well-versed on your child’s progress, build rapport with the teacher, and demonstrate to the school that you are an active and involved parent.
9. Be tolerant of others (of all ages).
   As a parent you may feel sometimes that no one is as invested in your child’s success as much as you. It is important to remember that teachers genuinely want to connect with every student, your child included, because this is where the seeds of learning are cultivated. Just keep in mind teachers have to do this with a lot of other kids as well.
10. Go team!
    Everybody in the school building is there to help your child learn, grow and thrive. The responsibility of achieving positive outcomes for your child extends beyond the homeroom teacher. Whether it is the custodian that keeps the dining area clean for your child’s peanut allergies, or the librarian that sets aside that special book your child is obsessing about, or the front desk clerk who is always so friendly when you sign out for all those doctor appointments, it really does take a village.